This Can’t be Real

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Today I opened up tissues, to wipe away the tears.

I should have been opening hair dye, for you to go platinum blonde.

When I cracked open a mountain dew, to keep me awake from 2 hours of sleep.

We should have been making DewMosas.

As I tried to eat garlic bread at lunch, sick to my stomach.

It should have been Pizza Hut cheesy bread, because it finally opened near here.

So many moments today that shouldn’t have been. Moments that don’t seem real. Ladies night wasn’t supposed to turn into this. This isn’t how life was supposed to go. You aren’t supposed to be gone.

You should be here laughing at my horrible stories, or explaining to me why you bought the brightest blonde you could find. You should be on your third DewMosa of the evening, getting hiccups from drinking to fast. Smiling and laughing while telling me about Lunds and what Eric and Nick have been up too.

Heaven wasn’t supposed to be where you celebrated ladies night. Heaven shouldn’t have as many angels as they do. Heaven shouldn’t have you.

We should have you. You should still be here. You should still be giving hugs. You should be making the kids laugh. You should be holding Sammy.

Heaven should be closed to residents.

No matter how angry it makes me that I will never hold you again, hug you or tell you I love you, you are in amazing hands. You lived a happy full life. You even became Mayor of Hopkins you knew so many people. We are all better for knowing you, stronger for having loved you and more full of love from living with you. Please give Grandma I a big hug, and watch after her. She gets lost sometimes at the casino’s. I’m sure there are casino’s all over Heaven, so good luck!

Please continue to look down over our family and keep the love, faith and dreams going strong. Forever in our hearts, always on our minds. I love you Lu!

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